Sunday, October 09, 2005

I Want a Medal, Damnit!

Yes I do. I really do. I've been 'suzie homemaker' today. For those of you too young to remember Suzie, she was an earlier version of Martha Stewart. I hate them both. I am normally NOT this person. Today, I must have gotten up on the wrong side of bed, 'cause it sure wasn't me zooming around this house!

(Disclaimer: I KNOW you all do these things every single day and most of you still have kids at home to make messes and take up your time. I am not saying I'm such a perfect person that I'm way better than you. No, I'm just whining and remember, it's MY blog and I can whine if I want to. You wanna whine, you go right ahead on your own blog.)

First, I got up at 4 a.m. with puppies. Yes, I am a good puppy-mom. Back inside, in my warm bed, Welling.ton draped across me, I zonk back to sleep. 6:30 a.m.. Puppies barking again. WTF? They can't need to go out already, can they? Hubby is still snoring, home late from the races and tired from the whole farm thing, I want to let him sleep so I flop Ton-Ton off onto the foot of the bed and proceed to get my shoes and sweatshirt on - again. Out we go.

Uh...pups? Kids? Let's go back inside, 'kay? It's COLD out here this morning! Figures. No go. They're having fun. Lots of fun. Way too much fun... 30 minutes worth of fun in the cold... completely ignoring every attempt I make to get them to come back in the house. I've yelled, pleaded, begged, growled, barked and meowed. They'll come over to see what I'm doing, but never get close enough to grab... and then zoom off in a wild sprint to the end of the yard. Crap.
Finally, they get tired and come inside. I'm seriously considering shock collars. This is not fun and I can just see them this winter!

Back to bed once more, I toss and turn - Hubby's up roaming around by now, and SIL and friend are still snoozing. (Did I mention they came up and stayed overnight last night? I think I did... ) I doze off once more, thinking about having the day off and what I should do but probably won't.

Up at 9. SIL is up and visiting with Hubby. Hubby's reading the Sunday paper and trying to get motivated to go to the field. SIL's friend comes up a bit later and we all visit a bit, then Hubby leaves and SIL and his friend try to figure out what they're doing today. SIL brings in some care packages that daughter has sent. Whoot!! (Yes, I know, it's usually the parents who send the care packages - suffice it to say one was sent back to her...) She works at CritterLand and has sent all kinds of fun animal treats and samples and her dog's rejects. Also sent some t-shirts and bags (What if I don't WANT to share????) and a book she just finished that she thought I'd like. I won't tell what I sent her, maybe she'll blog about it but I don't want to spoil the surprise...

SIL and friend decide they're going to go meet another friend for lunch and then head on home. Off they go, and I'm sitting on my ass looking at the pit my house has become. Laundry is sorted in piles in my bedroom, the bed's not made, the table and countertops are covered with houseplants that I brought inside so they wouldn't frost the other night and the dirty dishes are beginning to spread. Ugh. I really just want to go in the other room and read or sleep or blog.

I switch the laundry and get another load going. I pick up one of the plants and think, "what the hell, I may as well get this over with" . Ten plants re-potted, cleaned, fed, watered and put in their usual places later, the kitchen is a bigger mess than it was before. Now what? Change laundry again and start cleaning up the dirt, leaves and muck left from my plant project. Suppose I should do the dishes while I'm at it. Oh, yeah, and when I put the plants back I decided I'd probably be ahead of the game if I dusted where they went before I put them there - that led, naturally, to dusting everywhere. Now I have dishes done, plants done, laundry half done, and my floor is covered with leaves from one end to the other.

Vacuum. Yep. That's the ticket. Get the leaves up...and the dirt... oh, hell, the cat hair probably should be picked up too. Now I'm vacuuming everywhere. Including my closet. Oh, shit... how did all that stuff get piled up on the floor in my closet. Uh...I remember. I bought 'fat pants' and those are the 'skinny pants'. That other pile is the one I threw down as I was pulling things out to put in Em's care package. The pile over there is the dog-stuff that I've got stockpiled. Guess that stuff can go in the other room with all that stuff Em sent. Hey! I just found the Space Bags I got suckered into buying on sale at the drugstore about a month ago. Let's see if they work... hmmm..stuffing jeans in...so far so good. Pick up the bag...SHIT! I must have picked it up wrong, it came unzipped and half the load ends up on the floor. Start over. This time it works. Interesting... Well, I'm on a roll and have another one. Let's put away some summer stuff, doubt it's going to be warm enough to wear it again this year. Cool! That made some room! I can actually see the floor in my closet. I suppose I'll finish vacuuming in there...

The towels are clean and just out of the dryer. So are the bathroom rugs. I've just vacuumed the bathroom floors. What the hell, suppose I should clean the bathrooms...

The kitchen is so clean I'm inspired to mess it up. I think I'll make something. It's cold out. Hubby will probably come home starving. Let's see.... Chili! Yeah! We haven't had that for awhile.

The house is clean. The laundry is clean and put away. The pups have been out and in and are having thier supper. The other animals have been cared for. I am a disaster, but will take a shower when Hubby gets home and I'm sure I won't have to go to the field for anything. I am tired, but satisfied. Now if I could be assured this would all stay this way for a day or two... at least it should stay a little bit longer than when I had four little kids at home!

Tomorrow I'll be at work wishing I'd just said to hell with it and had a jammie day today...