Need I Say More?

The Weekend Is Upon Us

Finally. This has been a long week.

For those of you keeping track, son Jon got 3rd in his race last night! Whoot! Nothing wrecked, nothing blew up. Ready for racing again tomorrow night.

It's still hot. Humid. Iowa is now officially a tropical state.

Had a fun night last night. Em picked up Thai food on the way home from work and we packed up our 'puters and went to Amanda's place to eat and play WoW. (They've got fast i-net and can handle up to four players on their network.) Hadn't played in awhile for any length of time, so it was a fun relaxing evening. Only wish it hadn't been Thursday night so we could have stayed longer...

Today I only worked half a day then proceeded to spend the rest of the afternoon running errands. Sometimes I just feel like I go around and around spinning my wheels. Is it only me?

This weekend is my goal weekend to finish my bookwork. I think I can get it done, I've made great progress toward that goal and think I'll get there. Would be nice if I got done a day early so I could actually do something fun the rest of the weekend...

A shout-out goes to a friend who is laid up and suffering from bed rest. He's been told to stay off his feet for a couple of weeks (and has already been off them for a week) and he's going stir crazy. I know he sneaks out to his computer and downloads e-mails and reads blogs... and I've heard a rumor he may be sneaking in some WoW time (bad, bad, bad) but for the most part he's being good. He has a laptop and should be able to get i-net from his bed, but is having some technical difficulty. I keep telling him he needs to get that resolved - it would go a long ways toward aleviating some of the boredom, but so far he's been procrastinating. Send good thoughts his way... he's not a blogger, just a friend out there in the ozone...

Have a good weekend and stay cool people~~

Circles

No, I'm not talking crop circles... I'm talking about getting up this morning, looking in the mirror, and saying WTF?!?!? I have dark circles under my eyes. I look like Hubs clocked me in the night, but he didn't. Honest. It is the weirdest thing and I am facinated in that train-wreck-can't-stop-looking way.

First I have to explain. I am one of the whitest women on the planet. I don't tan, ever. When I try the fake bake it's just... bad. Hate to admit I've done that, but unfortunately I have pictures to prove it. I burn and peel and burn some more, or just go straight to the freckle stage. Over the years of envying my cousins' ability to turn a deep golden brown with the help of Crisco, no less, (yes, just like fryin' a chicken) I tried to do everything under the sun (bad pun) to get a tan. You name it, I tried it. I also tried to get that sun-kissed look to my mousy brown hair, but that's another whole post.

Back to the circles. I don't get them. I have been blessed with this fair skin that for some reason doesn't get dark bags under the eyes! I even had my personal makeup artist at M.A.C. tell me so. Okay, he's not my personal makeup artist, but he's the closest thing I'm gonna get to one. Believe me, when they tell you that you don't need a product, you'll believe them when they say you don't have the need, 'cause you just know they'll sell you everything they can think of if they think you need it in the smallest way. Guys, you don't get this, I realize, but trust me on this one.

So I wake up this morning with these dark purple shadows. Wow. Wondering what the heck I did during the night to bring this on? I went to sleep at 8 o'clock last night and slept all night long... I think I caught up a bit in the sleep department. Hmmm... maybe I slept on my face funny or something and cut off circulation to my head? Maybe I was so tired that Hubs did get me with an elbow... nah... he'd have to climb over the mountain of pillows I pile next to my side to get to me and I just can't see him making such a concentrated effort. I didn't even have Welling.ton there last night to give me a mark.

So, who knows what is up? Old age? Maybe it's just the troll in me coming out... guess I better not start saying I'm a dinosaur. Who knows WHAT would happen!

BEWARE the Troll

(Had a lovely photo of a troll, but can't get blogger to download it. Figures.)

That would be me. Feeling a bit down-in-the-dumps today. (You can skip the rest of this paragraph if you are a man or prefer not to hear about 'female' troubles.) That's one of the problems with having all your female bits removed in your 30's. You can't look at the calendar anymore and chalk it up to "that time" of the month. I'm sure with all the trouble I had back then with my bits, that it is possible the pieces that remain are still stirring things up, but no precise way to tell. The doctor put me on estrogen awhile back thinking I might be starting to go through "the change", but it didn't seem to make one iota of difference after being on it for two months, so I said to heck with it and quit. No sense pumping extra crap in my system if it's not doing anything.

So, here I sit. Feeling like the troll.

I talked to Hubs earlier this morning to see how much rain we got out of the evening and night-time thundershowers that rolled through. It sounded like a lot! It looked like a lot on radar every time I looked. Two tenths. Only two tenths. Further south of us they got two-to-five inches! Where we need it? Nope. Crap. He's now in a pissy mood, that doesn't help. His pissy moods tend to make my moods pissier.

My manager informs me at 11:30 today that there will be two tour busses coming to tour our plant. 80 people will be coming through to see what we do. Huh. This is a new one. So, we bust our butts cleaning the office and getting everything spiffy. Then he goes to lunch and I have to call him to come back when they arrive before he does. Luckily, the two groups took turns and waited for him to give them the tour, because as I told him if he tried to get me to be a guide I would suddenly get violently ill and have to go home. (Have I mentioned I'm anti-social?) I think they just left. Whew!

Updates: Jon got second in his heat race (good) but got 10th in the big race (he's done better) and no blowups (terrific). I guess the other drivers were hot-dogging and acting stupid, so lots of wrecks and messing up. Sometimes the "special races" where there is extra money at stake brings out the worst in them. Hubs didn't get home until late and although I tried to wait up for him, I fell asleep. When he did finally get home I didn't even remember him calling to tell me how Jon did!

Em and I went to see "The Devil Wore Prada". Eh. So-so. Kinda predictable. The only thing we couldn't get over was how much Meryl Streep's character reminded both of us of my mother-in-law. Scary. Truly.

I hope I get some sleep tonight. Maybe I'm just tired. Maybe I still need to win that lottery. I'd settle for some rain.

Tuesday Blah

Yep. That's pretty much how I feel. Dunno why. It keeps clouding up and looking like it's going to rain, then doesn't. That isn't helping. Jon is racing tonight. Would be nice if it would rain, even if he gets rained out. The way things are going right now, it will rain where his race is (northern part of the state) and not rain here (central part of the state).

Didn't do a darn thing last night except go the the grocery store (something I hate more and more the older I get) and water my flower gardens. Ended up sweaty and icky after that, so showered and got into my jammies before dinner. Had our first sweet corn of the year - that was delicious! Didn't have much, as it's not on the "approved" dietary list, but damnit! Fell asleep after dinner for about an hour, then woke up and watched TV for the rest of the evening. See? Excitement, I tell ya.

Up early to drop off the pups at the groomer before work. Picking up the shorn "kids" after work. Maybe if youngest daughter is up to it we'll take in a movie. Or not. Shit. Don't know if I can even drum up the energy. I hate when I get like this...

Monday, Monday

Except for making me suddenly have the Mamas and the Papas stuck in my head, I'm not sure what purpose that title serves. Except. It is Monday. Go figure. These are the other things currently bouncing around in my head - besides 70's folk tunes.

Jon raced Saturday night and didn't blow up! Whoot! That' s only part of the good news... he also came in second place! 'Bout time!

MIL actually had something better to do and didn't go to the races on Saturday. Needless to say Hubs was like a little kid released from detention an hour early. Only wish we could convince MIL she's a jinx or somethin' so she'd let him go alone more often...

Along those lines, the three day special race we went to last year that I talked about extensively ... uh... last year... Well, we're thinking about going again next month. Taking the RV. Camping. I wonder if we can slip MIL a sleeping potion so she just misses the whole thing? Probably not. Damn.

Another restaurant has taken my favorite thing away from me. Much like our favorite Mexican restaurant totally changed their and made it impossible for me to eat there again, now my favorite food of all time at Cheddars has been made inedible. Why? Why did they do this to me? Why the FUCK can't they leave things alone? Sorry. It had to come out. Yesterday I went to lunch and ordered my favorite spasana with alfredo sauce. I hadn't had it for awhile and was craving all it's creamy goodness. Yes, it is something I'm not supposed to have. Maybe that's why it is now so spicy I can't eat it? Who makes alfredo sauce spicy, for god's sake? I thought that was the idea of alfredo sauce... creamy...mild... Sooo... daughter (who agreed it had a tang to it) ate mine and I ate her sandwich and when the crabby bitch waitress came back I asked her if they'd changed the recipe. "No, and let me get the manager for you", she replied. I didn't want the manager, damnit. Oh, well, here he comes. "You know, some people think it's spicy and some people don't. Sometimes I've eaten it and it seems spicy and sometimes it isn't. Even when it's been made by the same cook! But, no, we've not changed the recipe." Huh. We'll that's just weird then, because I've eaten here dozens of times and I've NEVER seen this red spice in my sauce... I don't know if it's chili powder or cayenne (what I suspect) or what, but it's never. been. there. before. I would know. If this is the way you think this is supposed to be, Mr. Manager, then I won't be eating it again...

Wishing I didn't have to rant and rave to get 11 comments... (Agriculture post). Does this mean you don't think I warrent a comment more often and you are lurkers, or are you just people who comment on substance and basically I have no substance? Maybe if I talked about sex with donkeys or cannablism or something then I would get more traffic... ?

Saturday turned out to be a fun day spent with Amanda. I spent the morning being responsible and doing housework, etc., then ran off to play World of Warcraft with her. I've missed it. I've missed the people I play with. I've got to get this other crap done so I can go back to playing! Why didn't they have this when I was a kid?

Okay, all for the moment. I'm sure more will come as the day progresses...

Please Note:

More than one post today. Aren't YOU the lucky ones!

A Little Advice, Please?

I'm just curious... how do you respond to your readers? When people comment do you answer them in your own comments, do you e-mail them, comment on their sites, or address it in another post. I'm just not sure what is the general concessus on this and sometimes I feel I should be doing a better job of responding to you all. I DO read each and every comment and some do deserve a response!

Along the same lines, how do you know if someone comments on your blog from an earlier post? Do you have an e-mail sent to you or do you use something else. I've never gotten "into" some of the extra programs I think you can use to do this stuff... Hey! I've only been here a couple of years! Give me a break... :)

Sometimes It Just Can't be Helped

Jon raced again last night.

Someone spun out in front of him and he couldn't miss them. There goes a rocker arm and who-knows-what-else. The motor didn't blow up, tho'!! (No, I don't know if he raced long enough to even be able to tell if it was going to hold together or not.)

There's always Saturday night...

Remember Kids: Take Me Out in the Street and Shoot Me

I admit it. I'm not as patient with my parents and mother-in-law as I should be. It isn't that I don't love them, I do. We've gotten to the "I'm the parent, you're the kid" stage and it's a little bit heartbreaking. These bright, vibrant people are starting to have all their quirks show up in the worst ways.

A few days ago my mother called to let me know they had gotten an offer on their property in Arkansas (where the house burned down). The real estate agent from down there is also a friend of theirs and happened to be in California visiting her children. She had e-mailed an attachment to my parents with the offer. Mom was frustrated because she couldn't get the e-mail to appear, it was being blocked by McAfee spamkiller.

First thing you need to know is this: My mother should not be allowed to be around any technology. Ever. Yes, she worked with computers once-upon-a-time. PC's that were first born without a mouse. She is the one who thought you just held the mouse and did things and stuff moved on the computer - she didn't know you had to actually move the mouse.

So I called the real estate agent and had her e-mail the information to me. It came in fine, in a *.pdf format and I printed it and took it to my parents that same night. (They now live 40 minutes away instead of 9+ hours away. Oh. Yea.) They were thrilled, did what they needed to, and went to their public library to fax the info back to the agent. All was well in the world.

Until last night.

(Did I mention that I found the document in my mom's e-mail and showed her how to get into the spamkiller and find things that were blocked and release them? Of course I wrote down the instructions. I always do.)

Last night as I settled in for a relaxing night of ... whatever... the phone rings. My mother has received more information from the real estate agent and they are to read stuff, fill it out, sign it and send it back. She can't get it to come up in a size that isn't printing on four pages. It's huge. We talk. This time they must have scanned in the documents and sent each one as a *.jpg. Greeeaaat... change the format on my mother. Just what she needs.

Being 40 miles away and not having her computer programs memorized, I begin trying to walk her through various ones to try and bring in the pictures to print from them. First, of course, having to get her to SAVE the ones that have come. Task one. Completed. Now we try this one. No go. That one. No luck. Since I don't have exactly the same programs, I'm trying to figure out what she's looking at by having her tell me. This isn't working so well. Finally after getting totally frustrated (yes, I worked with her on the phone for about an hour), I suggested she forward the e-mail to me, let me see if I could do something with it and send it back.

The e-mails come trickling in. The first one, with two attachments, comes in three times. The second one, with six attachments, comes in two times. Okay, Mom. Got it. Stop pushing the buttons!

Now I look. I bring them into MS Word, save them as a document, and e-mail them back. Well, I e-mail the one with two attachments back. The other one turns out to be a big honker and I don't dare zip it up, it would take another 4 hours to go through zipping and unzipping. I decide that I'll send each one on it's own... but also decide if I'm going to do this I'm going in the bedroom on the laptop so I can at least watch TV while doing it. I get set up, open my e-mail program, and there is a message from my mom. "Still won't print". WTF?

I call.
Me:It won't print?
Mom: Nope.
Me: The printer is on, right? (Hey, I HAD to ask!)
Mom: Yes.

We try a couple of things and it won't even print a test page. Nothing. It was printing earlier, she says - that's how she knew the documents were too big to fit on the page. Arrrggghhh! By now we're looking at 10 o'clock and I know I'M tired... I will print off everything and run it down to them first thing in the morning and will check out the printer at that time.

This morning I'm up bright and early and go to my folks. I hand them the papers I printed and headed right for the computer. Printer on. Check. Paper in. Check. Look for documents on computer. They're there. Check. Try to print. No go. I look at the print que and there are a couple of weird things. I clear out the print que. I turn the printer off and on. I try to print. Nothing.

Hmmm.... once more I go to print que. Weird doc is still there. Okay, I'll play the silly game... I'll let it print. It does. It was the extra large e-mail pages that Mom had been trying to print. Once I got them cleared out of the que, I had no trouble at all. I found out she had more than one graphics program (that were very easy to use) that she should have been able to print the *.jpg's from. I tried it. It worked. We looked through and tried to print the one I'd sent her. It worked. Hmmm... now it won't mess up. What's up?

Mom: Go back to that window where you saw the printer stuff
Me: The print window?
Mom: Yeah, that one you just had up.
Me: Okay...
Mom: There! You are supposed to check that box... "Print the file"
Me: It says "Print TO file"... have you been checking that box each time?
Mom: ....yes....

I'm at work now. I'm missing a big patch of hair on the left side where I grabbed it and pulled as hard as I could with frustration as I drove out of the drive. (kidding! geez!) My mother swears up and down she's going to pay me back for all the trouble. Please, mom... don't.

Not a Good Thing

A woman has applied for the open position in our office. Have I mentioned farmers are rednecks? Yeah. They would never warm up to her. They aren't going to buy anything she pushes. They aren't going to listen to any advice she'll have. No matter how good she is, it just. Won't. Work.

Beside that, I don't want to work with a woman.

Okay. Now that I've gotten that off my chest I can sit back and wait for the fur to fly. Hit me with your best shot.

Sometimes I Just Rattle

A few thoughts rattling through the empty spot in my brain at the moment:

• When I post something at the top, and mention it is pinned to the top, and even attach another message saying there are new posts below said pinned post, are people actually reading the new posts? I'm just curious because I've gotten NO comments on the past few posts that are new... under the "lecture" post... Yes, I'm a blogwhore. I want feedback, damnit!!
• Eldest son's girlfriend had emergency gall bladder surgery yesterday afternoon. We wish her all the best for a speedy recovery. I can't believe they do that kind of thing on an outpatient basis! She went home last night! Incredible.
• Youngest son, Jon, is racing again tonight. Yes, with a motor. (smartass) He did most of the work on it yesterday while the mechanic who was too busy to work on it sat and talked to him the whole time. WTF? Keep your fingers crossed.
• If you go to sleep at 7:30 in your recliner, then fall back asleep in bed after your wife wakes you up and tells you to go to bed, it makes perfect sense that you will be wide awake at 3 a.m. Making the next logical step... that wife will also be wide awake at 3 a.m. Thanks, honey.
• Is it just me, or does it seem like there has been a lot of sick-crap going around lately? 3T , Livey and Michael, just to name few are really under the weather. Go give 'em a hug. (Virtual, darlings... we don't want you to get what they have.) Just getting over some of this myself, I can empathize. Big.Time.
• Darrell made it home safely! This is good news. Now he can figure out what he's doing with the rest of his life summer. Nice to meet you, D... don't be a stranger.
• Mikey has a 'puter again! Whoot! Go see the great interview he got with Ryan White's mom. Glad to see ya back, Mikey!!
• A couple of my favorite people are going through some stressful times... Jules has been having a bit of a family crisis. Kids are wonderful, but they can tear your heart out... Santa Cruz' own Sizzle is still job-hunting and settling into Seattle. I'm not sure Seattle has figured out what's blown into town yet... they will! Only good thoughts for you both.
• As hot as we think it is here, Helen and Jade are really turning into crispy critters... hope it cools off soon for you, girlfriends... no fun at all. (Especially Helen! What's with no air conditioning on that berg? I mean, good grief!!)

Tomorrow is Friday. It's about time.

ARRRGGGHHH!

Jon raced last night. Came in second in his heat race. Qualified for the main feature. Went a few laps in the main feature and the motor blew up.

Can you say, "FUCK!".

Yeah. That pretty well sums it up.

At least the car owner is now good and pissed. He's spent the big bucks at this company getting motors for his other classes of cars and he is finally seeing what we've been talking about. Why does every other car go round and round, but not Jon? Hell, he's fast and he's good - and if they could get a motor to stay together long enough then he could tweak the rest of the options available to make it even faster! His talent is being wasted on blown motors!

Owner swears he'll be racing the next special race. Tomorrow night. Let's see if they can make a motor that will stay together.

The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly

The Good.

• I'm feeling better. Thanks. Occasional coughing fit, but the operative word is occasional.
• We've gotten some rain.
• Jon (youngest son) was on the local radio racing program last night. He sounded smart and funny and ... well, like Jon! I'm so proud of my kids... all of 'em. They do these things and I can't believe they're mine. They are all so self-possessed and strong in their own ways. Nothing like me! (Excuse me while I wipe a tear. Okay, sickening, I know...)
• Hubs was talked about extensively on radio program. Not only given credit to by Jon, but by the program interviewer who has known Hubs for years. (One of those things that happens when you grow up in the same house your whole life.) All of it was good. Wish I'd had a tape of it. Damn.
• Light at the end of the tunnel where bookwork is concerned. One account up-to-date and actually reconciled! Whoot!
• Jon has special races for the next few weeks. Not only will he be racing his usual programs on Friday and Saturday nights, but now there are extra ones interspersed on weeknights. Possibility of large quanities of money to be won. More opportunities to get the 'bugs' worked out of the modified car.

The Bad.

• When you get "older" and you've had four children and you have extensive coughing spells... well... let's just say kegels only go so far.
• Not enough rain yet. More, please. (Still listening? Oh, and just for the record, you could turn the heat down a tad... thanks.)
• Gas prices are still going up - and what the hell is with enthanol blends now being MORE expensive than regular? That's just nuts. I guarentee you the farmer is not getting the increase.
• Corn prices are going down. WTF? (FYI - I'm going to have to rant about this again soon.)
• Still have two more accounts to get up-to-date where bookwork is concerned.
• After bookwork is caught up I need to clean my office, do a bunch of filing, shredding, throwing, organizing, and general cleaning. Ugh. I'm tired already.
• I am determined to get my "crap" room organized this year. That would be 2006, smartasses. I also need to start working on my Christmas cards if I want to go back to my 'normal' homemade ones. What's the sense of having all this stuff if I don't use it? I remember when I did I enjoyed it immensely. Gotta get off the butt and just DO it.

The Ugly.

• Those special races? Extra races? I've only got one word to say about that. Mother-in-law. Poor Hubs. He's going to be insane before it's over.

If You Find the Weekend, Would You Send It Back?

It's Monday. Where did the weekend go??? Yes, I know I haven't posted since Wednesday. Wanted to give you all a chance to catch up. (I can say that - you don't know differently, now, do you?) All in all a good weekend.

Friday was a race night and my mother-in-law was picking up Hubs to go to the race. She always comes at 5:30. Always. Except when she doesn't. When doesn't she? When I work until 5 o'clock and race home to see Hubs for a few minutes before he leaves. I get home at 5:10 and her car is there. WTF? So much for having a few minutes to visit with Hubs. (Get your mind out of the gutter. No "quickies" were involved.) Oh, yes, she says... thought I'd come early. Arrgghh.

Darrell and his son Cristian came back to town on Friday, although they didn't make it to my house until Saturday evening they spend Friday night with Amanda's family. The boys were tickeled to be able to play together again. On Saturday night we had a good visit and I was much more relaxed this time. This is the way to do it! The first meeting is nerve-wracking and you are all worried about if you'll be the same to them as you come across in your blogging, and wondering if they are going to be what you have imagined them to be. By the second meeting you know what to expect. I guess in some of these large group blog-meets they last all weekend and there is alchohol involved. That probably helps. All I know is he is as warm and intelligent and funny in person as he was the first time - and Cristian is electric! Wish I had that kids' energy... I now have a "voice" to put with a blog and can only hope he'll make it back this way next month for the fair... (hint)

Also on Saturday I managed to get several errands run and my house cleaned before everyone came. That pretty well wiped out Saturday.

Insert racing update: Son Jon started 9th and came in 5th on Saturday. He's not been having very good luck lately. A couple of weeks ago he blew up the motor in the modified car, and they put another motor in that wasn't as powerful just to get by. He did okay with it, but it just wasn't the motor for that car. This week they got the modified motor put back in and went racing Friday night.... and... blew up another motor. Hubs, son, and car owner are not happy campers. Hubs and son are particularily disgusted because the motors are being built by the same people and they would love to go somewhere else. I'm not sure why they keep going back except they have so much money invested already and keep trying to get them to do it right. I'm frustrated too - why is it everyone else on the track is still going and Jon had to blow up? No one can seem to tell us why... just want more money. Grrr... So, anyway, he took the motor to be fixed on Saturday morning, worked on it all day, and was ready to race by Saturday night (this kid can whip a motor apart in no time at all!). It didn't blow up, but just didn't have the power they wanted. More tweaking will be required, I'm sure.

Sunday I spent spinning my wheels. I was up early and for no particular reason got a wild hair to make a big breakfast - pancakes, eggs, bacon. Of course, the one morning that my Hubs sleeps in... a little cold for him (yes, I nuked it) but I enjoyed it. Then I started back on the ever-dreadful bookwork. Yes, I am making progress, thank you for asking. I can almost see light at the end of the tunnel. That will be good news for those of you who may have thought I'd quit WoW altogether. Nope. Just have to take care of priorities, you know. Hubs went to the shop and was going to bring back the mower and get that done before it got too hot. (It's been in the 90's the past few days with very high humidity - the heat index has been in the 100's. Thank goodness we got the rain we did! We've gotten another 2" since my original rain post, too, and things are growing like crazy. Can use more rain- maybe later this week I heard there is a chance- but we'll take what we got.) He got tied up doing things and didn't get back until almost noon. By then I was ready for a break and offered to mow.

Did I mention I'm jinxed? I must be, for I only got about a fourth of the lawn done when the mower stopped. Dead in it's tracks. The motor was still running, the mower blades were still churning, the deck still went up and down (this is a tractor, in case anyone wondered), but it wouldn't move! Now, this thing isn't that old... so.... I think the dealer is getting a call today. It still should be on warrenty. Hopefully they'll figure it out. End result? I mowed just enough to sweat like a pig and get filthy.

Showered, refreshed, and full - Hubs grilled burgers while I was mowing - I head back to the bookwork.

...and now it's Monday and I'm at work.

Flashback

I originally posted this (a few days late) last year. It really does say it all in a way that I probably couldn't top this year. Another year has passed and we're still here... and I still love you, Honey... more than ever.

Soul Mate

A milestone went by and I forgot to mention it, or if I mentioned it I didn't give it enough credit. Earlier this month Hubby and I celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary. That's the 'official' anniversary, although we actually consider a year earlier when we got together to be our 'real' anniversary.

It wasn't a storybook romance. It was a strange sort of an affair. I was married, and although we (the ex and I) were sharing an apartment, two children, and a mountain of bills, we were not sharing the marital bed. We'd decided we couldn't afford to live on our own, neither of us wanted to live with our parents, and we still considered ourselves friends, so we'd just share the space and all that was in it and lead our own lives.

The ex worked days. I worked nights. After work I would sometimes go out with single girlfriends. We would go to a college town a little ways from where we lived and hit the local bars. My girlfriends had already spent way more time in these places than I had and knew some people, so that made it easier. I found out about a year after I'd first started going to this local bar that my now-husband had seen me there with my friends and had asked around about me and found out that I was still married with two kids - so even though I didn't know him, he knew somethings about me.

I've told the story of how we met before, and won't go into all that again... but suffice it to say when I met him it was comfortable. Safe. He made me feel a way I'd never felt before - that it was all going to be okay. He'd wrap his arms around me and give me what I called a 'bear hug' and it would bring tears to my eyes it was so perfect. He was so strong, but could be so gentle with me. He listened to me - his deep brown eyes totally focused on me. He was shy, but was brave enough to try and bring me out of my shell. He was smart and funny and warm and all the good stuff... I wasn't looking for another attachment. I'd told myself - and actually told him that I wasn't going to get involved with anyone again. I'd had enough. Men were okay as friends, but marriage was out. Good thing he didn't listen to me!

He made me feel so good about myself... something that was sorely lacking in my life. He didn't just love me for my body or my looks or what I could do for him, he loved me for me. I'd already been through some pretty rough times and my trust was pretty thin. I was cynical, always looking for the downside - waiting for the other shoe to drop. I kept thinking he was too good to be true. I spent a lot of time with him, as much as I could. Finally we decided I would move to his town and see how it went. I was reluctant to take my children since I had no means of support yet in this place, so I spoke to my ex and we decided the kids would stay with him for a short time while I got a job and got settled. He didn't know about the new man in my life, and I didn't want to hurt his feelings by bringing it up. I just let him believe I was doing this myself.

I moved, and my ex ended up moving back home with his parents, with our children. I got a job, got settled, and tried to see my children. His parents wouldn't let me. They hit me with a lawsuit - they were suing for full custody. I was crushed. They would answer the phone and wouldn't even let me talk to my ex, guessing rightly that he still had feelings for me and wouldn't put me through this - let alone our children. My guy stuck through it all. The rants and raves and crushing tears. He was there for me. Finally, after several months of back and forth, and finally at least some visitation, we went to court where my ex met me at the door and said he and his lawyer had come up with an idea. Joint custody. This was very, very new at the time and you had to talk the judge into it. You had to convince the judge that you got along well enough with your ex to have joint custody, so you weren't pitting the kids against each other. We did that. I was to have the kids during the week, he was to see them on the weekends. We rejoiced.

My guy now not only had a wife, but two children under 5 - the confirmed bachelor was a family man. He jumped in with both feet. As much as he loved me, he loved my children and treated them like his own. He never treated them differently... if anything he was heartbroken when they had to go to "their dad's" - because he felt like that was him. Through the years, and a couple more kids, and a lot more critters, we've been through heaven and hell. Several years ago all the bad things that I thought I'd successfully put behind me, hidden in boxes of my mind came tumbling down and out jumped the demons I'd tried to vanquish. They took me by surprise and my husband by bigger surprise. It was a few months of hell on earth - nervous breakdowns aren't fun - but I'm so much better now. I give all the credit to him. He saved me.

He loves me. He really does. To some he may not be the best looking man - He's no Brad Pitt or Ewin McGregor. He's more Tom Hanks and Harrison Ford. Not perfect, but he's so beautiful inside it makes up for any flaws. He's funny. He's smart. He's sexy. (He doesn't think so.) He has no confidence in himself. He's beautiful to me. He makes terrific babies. He really is my soul mate. 25 years is only a blink... I hope we get a lifetime more. It's been quite the ride. Happy Anniversary, Honey...

Hey! You WERE Listening!

1.8" overnight (at home).
2.3" at work (south and west of home).
3.5" at co-worker's house in town (west of home).

Needless to say, Hubs had a smile in his voice this morning when he called me to give me the rain gauge total. Me? I told him it wasn't enough. I was kidding, people...geez!

There's a chance of rain all day.

Dear Co-Worker*

You are being an asshat.

Just because our co-worker is gone does not mean you start trashing his judgment. When a customer comes in repeating what said co-work's opinion was on a product, you do not start bad-mouthing said opinion when he's not here to defend himself. I mean, just because he's not here anymore doesn't mean his judgement is no longer as good as it was when he was here. You wouldn't have said those things while he was still working here... would you?

Oh. Maybe I'd better consider the source. You? You just might. Asshat.

*Venting is a wonderful thing.

I Couldn't Resist

I stole this from Amy. I'm dedicating it to an almost-member of our family. You know who you are.

Ten Ways To Tell If You Have Estrogen Issues...

1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.
2. You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet.
3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.
4. Your husband (significant other) is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.
5. You're using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says: "How's my driving-call 1- 800-".
6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.
7. Everyone seems to have just landed here from "outer space".
8. Your home thermostat doesn't seem to be cooling no matter what it's set on.
9. You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.
10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday

Of course, none of this applies to ME....

Monday - Did You Miss Me?

No rain, but a chance today and tonight. (You listening, God?)

Bookwork. Getting there. Not there yet. Damn. On the plus side, I did find a $600 error in our favor on one of our bills. Now, that makes the weekend feel not so lost. I think by the end of next weekend I'm going to be back to my abnormally organized self. I can dream, can't I?

Lottery? Well, ya gotta play to win... and I just forgot to play. Duh.

A break in the action on Friday night to go see "Pirates of the Caribbean" with my two lovely daughters. This one and this one. I tell you... I'm not sure what I laughed harder at, the movie or the girls. Amanda is a kill. For such a little person she has the biggest laugh... and believe me, she was laughing. She'd not seen the first movie, so Jack Sparrow was a new experience and judging from the hoots and hollars coming from the seat next to me, he was a huge hit! She also has always been the one who gasps and screams and covers her eyes and ears at every bit of surprise. Since she was a little girl (being the eldest) we've always told the kids, "It's only pretend" when things got scary on TV or movies. She's now 30 years old and I leaned over to her in the theater the other night and whispered, "It's only pretend!!"... She was hilarious. Then, I'd laugh because I'd hear Em on the othe side laughing at Amanda. I tell you, it was a toss-up between laughing at the movie and laughing at the girls. Thank goodness we were in the very back row of the theater!

Weekend was made for the race fans, too. Youngest son raced Friday, Saturday and Sunday night in three different towns. Did very well for racing the modified with a back-up engine from a stock car. I think he's supposed to get the regular modified engine back this week, so watch out for him next weekend. He's really loving this faster car...

I can't forget to mention Hubs had the time of his life on Saturday night at the races. More than usual. Why? Because his mother had other plans! Whoot! He came home so lighthearted and happy and had such great time. I wish I could figure out a way to make her not go every single time. It's driving him nuts.... no, not only him, but the other people around them, too... He just wants to have some fun and enjoy something with our son without his mother tagging along...!! It would be fine if she could fit in, but the term square peg in a round hole? That is her to a "T". As I write this, I wonder sometimes if my kids feel that way about me... wishing I wouldn't tag along. Oh, well... they read this. If they don't want me to go I should hope they have enough sense to know they can tell me they don't want me involved and to know it's not going to crush me. Ya listening, kids? We've even considered selling the RV because it's just not fun to go when she goes along... and she just invites herself without asking! Don't know... it's a no-win situation. She's a sweet lady, but there are just times you don't want to have her around...

Last, but not least, in the 'what was I thinking' department, Darrell and his son may be stopping back through on his way heading home later this week. Perhaps I'll remember to take pictures this time. Doh.

Those friends who WoW... now you know why I was MIA most of the weekend.

That's my weekend wrap-up. Is it really Monday already?

Friday Ramblings

The co-worker who is gone... is missed. A lot.

It's going to be a weekend filled with my continuing attempt to get my bookwork organized. (How did it get to be such a mess?) Feel my pain.

I'm still coughing. Thanks for asking.

Still need rain. Ya listening, God?

I'm getting to know some of my WoW co-players better. Interesting how we can have so many things in common besides the game.

It always amazes me how many talented people there are in the world - most who don't even know they hold such talent.

I wish I had more energy.
I wish I was more organized.
I'd sure like to win that lottery.
Not necessarily in that order.

I thank the powers that be every day for my beautiful family and loving Hubs. I'd give it all up to have them be happy.

Have a good weekend... I'm gonna be busy.

In Search Of...

...me, apparently.

I got into the doctor's office at 9:00 yesterday. This was an "opening" they had, mind you, not just a "come sit in our office and wait until the doctor feels you've suffered a significant amount of time with the other sick people and will let you into the inner sanctum appointment". I think I may have been better off taking a number. I wait... and wait...and wait... and finally get into the little exam room where I wait...and wait...and wait... *sigh*

After lots of thumping and breathing and listening and coughing (that's just me!) the doc blows right past the chest troubles and goes straight to the diabetes. "Your numbers are still high". Um...yes...

She sends me to the lab to have my blood sugar "officially" taken. (Excuse me, guess I forgot how to do it in the last 15 years...! Oh, no, that's right - the lab has to have their cut of the bill, too...) WTF? Why am I getting a BRUISE from where you poked my finger? A BRUISE! Yikes! You are supposed to be the professional... I could have gotten blood out without that much effort! Yes, it's still high. We visit a bit. The subject of Splenda (artificial sweetner) comes up and I tell her that's the only kind I can have that won't give me a migraine. She starts in on how Splenda isn't much better than sugar, yadda, yadda, yadda.... Well, excuse the fuck out of me. First I have to give up Pepsi, now I'm supposed to give up Pepsi One? I think not, bitch.

At last, but not least, she decides to treat me. Ooooo...coool!

I'm getting antibiotics and an inhaler... oh, yeah, and she's upping the diabetes med dosage. Now I must wait for the nurse to come give me a lesson on how to use the inhaler. I've not used one of these "powder" ones before - at least I'm hoping they are a little easier for uncoordinated me to use.

You got it. I wait. I swear, I thought the nurse figured I'd gone home. Another 15 minutes, at least.

At long last, she comes and teaches me. Yes, I can do this. Whoo hooo!

Out the door with only a momentary pause to re-schedule another appointment in a month. Now I must go see my local drug pushers and get my perscriptions filled. I walk in to see... a line... of old people. Ugh. Can this day get worse? I must wait to give the lovely pusher my paperwork. I explain how this one med is being increased, and I thought I'd just pick it up while I was there, even tho' I wasn't out of it yet. Oh, dumb, dumb, me. I slip into the magazine isle and look at the headlines... nope, nothing new. I look at the rest of the crap stuff for sale in the store. Gee... nope. Nothing I want. I circle back to the pusher window only to be greeted by the 80-year-old woman they have working the cash register today. "Your name again, dear"... I reply with... my name... and she goes off to check.

Nope. Not ready yet. They're still working on it.

The line hasn't shrunk much... except maybe in height. I think they are more hunched over than they were when we began this journey together. Everyone who picks up their perscriptions must chat with the counter-lady. Everyone friggin' one of them must ask the pharmacist a question. Stopping the progress. To a stand-still.

Now, not only is my chest hurting, my head hurting, and my poor stomache muscles are hurting (who knew you could hurt so many things just by coughing!) ... now my back is beginning to scream. I don't do well standing for long periods of time. I start the "mommy rock". That's what I call it... Those mother's with small children can relate. When you are holding a child you can't just stand there, you must rock, back and forth from one foot to the other. It's a law of physics that a child cannot be held motionless. Well, after four children, I just do the rock subconciously whether I'm holding kids, puppies, or my groceries. I'm sure someone out there has seen me. Please pretend you don't. It helps the back a little, but not a lot. Time is crawling. My stomach is growling now, after no breakfast (overslept after not sleeping all night - go figure) and my mornings' adventures in medicine.

I just want to get my drugs and go.

Finally... my name is called. What? It's not ready yet? It appears the insurance company doesn't want me to have the one medicine that is being increased. They say I can have it in TWO DAYS, but not now. It's too soon. The pharmacy is waiting to hear back from them. Oh, fer cripes sake! Just give me the others and I'll come back for that one, if they're gonna be that way... grrrr...

Another 10 minutes of agony fun goes by and at last I get to deal with the troll behind the counter.

I'm free! I'm free! Lord almighty, I'm free at last!

I get in my car and notice my phone. I'd left it in the car during my doctor visit because god-forbid you should mess up someone's pacemaker in the doctors' office. I'd forgotten to pick it up when I went into the pharmacy. I glance at the screen... 11 MISSED MESSAGES... glares at me with accusing eyes. Yes, eyes. I can tell without even opening my phone that the eyes that are coming at me through the phone are none other than my Hubs'. I call... "WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?"... Yep, he loves me.

I find out he's called my office, my daughter, last-but-not-least the doctors' office (she left 2 hours ago...BULLSHIT!). I agree to go truck corn with him instead of going back to work. I call work and let them know he's not crazy (yes, they know him and figure it's all fine). I don't bother to call back the doctor, although she ends up calling me twice later that afternoon to "tweak" things a bit... I call daughter who promptly blurts out,

"You're ALIVE!... and when is Dad putting the GPS bracelet on your ankle?"

She has a way of summing things up.

We've Got Company In Town

What were they thinking? I can only guess.

Is There a Doctor In the House?

There must have been some nasty stuff in that mulch... 'cause it's back with a vengence.
The past two nights have been fun-filled with coughing, gagging, tears, and lack of sleep. I can feel the crap in my lungs and have been trying unsuccesfully to treat it with otc meds. I give up. As soon as the clinic opens this morning I'm calling and begging them let me get poked and prodded and hopefully diagnosed with something treatable from their bag o' tricks.

Hope your holiday was better. I spent most of the day cat-napping from being up the night before, and the rest of the time working on bookwork. The excitement is overwhelming, I can tell... I did peek out the window after dark and watched a bit of the fireworks from the neighboring town. It was pretty, but really - without any youngsters around to get excited, it's just another fireworks' display.

The neighbors were very quiet this holiday weekend. I'm suspecting they went out of town. In years past this has been the perfect opportunity to polish up the guns and shoot skeet and/or illegal fireworks all day and into the night. Can't say I miss 'em.

Will let you know what I find out... *cough* * cough*

Dear Former Favorite Mexican Restaurant -

A couple of weeks ago my husband, daughter and I went to your establishment with all the anticipation of a visit from Santa Claus. We don't get to your place as often as we would like, what with life interferring and all, but you are right up there at the top of the list of places we go to when we partake of food prepared by someone else.

You have been in our community for quite some time. During that time we've seen some minor changes come and go. You remodeled (a bit) and lightened up the interior of your place to the point you can a.) now see what is on your plate and b.) it is not red - we appreciate you removing the red light bulbs from everywhere and c.) the screened-in patio is a great idea.

Here ends my praise.

You have disappointed me greatly. I will not be back.

The first thing we noticed after being seated was the music. What is this modern pop crap? So much for authentic Mexican, huh? I mean, you never played just south-of-the-border stuff, but at least it wasn't in-your-face pop. Don't get me wrong, I like pop music - in the right setting. This, however, wasn't it.

Daughter noticed the wait staff's uniforms had changed. Hmmm...

We ordered drinks. They were the same. Big sigh of relief... they have the best Margarita's I've ever tasted. Ever. No, I didn't have one - I was being "good" - but Hubs had one and it hadn't changed. Point one for you.

Now the kicker. The menu is presented. WTF? We search the menu... high....and low... and all over... where did my favorites go? They are gone. All gone. All of them. ALL OF THEM. We ask the first gentleman who came to wait on us... perhaps the name had been changed? Uh... no.

"This is similar", he says.
Uh huh.
"How similar?"
" Well, it has this and this and this...and this dressing. "
"Is it hot? I don't mean heat-hot, I mean spicy-hot?"
"No. It just has lots of flavor." He offers to bring me some to try.

I am weird, but I am really sensitive to spicy food. I usually will take what everyone else is calling "mild" and burn the top layer right off of my tongue. I try and explain this to the waiter-guy.

We ask about the favorite of my daughter. Oh, yes, they still have that... they just changed the sauce. Hubs' favorite is still in-tact, they claim. They just changed the name because people couldn't identify the cutesy name they had given it with the actual name of the dish. Whatever.

Now, the waiter-guy brings out our chips, salsa (the freebies) and our drinks... and a little dish of the dressing. I try it. It not only has no heat, it has no flavor. I mean, none. It tastes like oil... straight from Wesson. Well, that does not sound appealing on a bed of lettuce, chicken, guacomole, and other veggies. The alternate is ranch dressing. Um... well, seeing as we are in a Mexican restaurant, I like to be a little bit authentic, so, no... I'll look at the menu a little longer.

Daughter and Hubs order. I get something I think I can live with... two flour tortillas filled with cheese,grilled peppers and chicken. Cassadilla. (sp?) I think that sounds like something I can handle. I ask the waitress to hold the onions.

We ask the waitress... oh, by the way, did the restaurant change hands? No... they just made some changes. Uh huh. Okay.

Here comes the food. Goodie! I'm hungry! Bite one. OMG. It burns...!!!!!!!!!!! Water! (Yes, I know water is not the best thing for hot-mouth but I didn't happen to have anything else at hand.) WHAT just HAPPENED?

Daughter takes a bite of mine. Hmmm... a bit hot she says, but I can't pinpoint why...

Her plate looks... different. Her chicken dish has come with a totally different sauce. It may have the same basic ingredient, chicken, but the rest is not the same. The lovely fresh fruit they used to serve with it has been replaced by some hot fruit/veg thing that looks... well, just BAD... and apparently tastes so, too. The lettuce she used to get with it? Nonexistant.

Hubs? Hubs dish is pretty much the same except the sides are a bit different there, too. He claims it isn't as good as it used to be, but can't say exactly why.

I watch them eat and don't venture to eat anymore of my painful entree. The waitress finally comes back by to check on us when we (they) are almost done eating. She notices I've barely touched mine (to her credit). I tell her I can't eat it, it's too hot.

"oh... they didn't tell you about the jalapeno peppers?"

That would be YOU sweetheart who should have told me. I mean, I told everyone and their dog who came around to our table that I. Couldn't. Eat. Spicy. Food.

Waiter-guy number one comes around and offers to cook me another entree without the peppers. He takes credit for not having told our waitress that I coudn't eat hot food. Whatever. We are trying to get to a movie, so we don't have time to wait for the re-do. Perhaps if she'd have checked on us earlier in the meal that would have worked, who knows?

So... let's recap. New menu. Nothing the same. None of the changes were impressive. No one liked their meal. Margarita still good. Wait staff doesn't communicate something as important as when-you-are-a-Mexican-restaurant being sure the patron can EAT the food.

Unless we're just drinking, we won't be back. It's too bad. They were one of our favorites.

How Much Faster Time Flies

Has it only been a year since my eldest son and I traveled to Kansas to surprise my youngest daughter on her birthday? One year? Whooo hee... seems like it's been a lot longer, so much has happened this year.

With all the drama surrounding her divorce getting finalized - this coming week - and the move back home, it's been far from dull. She's re-working her life and coming up with new plans and goals and dreams... and yet... she is still the same girl/woman I have known and loved forever.

She and I spent some 'quality' time last night together while Hubs was a youngest son's race. (Motor blew up, btw... *sigh*). We hit about every subject on the planet, and then some. What a unique perspective she has on the world! Funny, refreshing, and bright... she kept me laughing most of the evening.

She tells me she thinks our family "isn't normal"... but in a good way...
She gets hit on just by walking in a bookstore and buying Russian literature...
She's a lovely, TALL, redhead with a bright smile and gorgeous auburn eyes... and those WoW-ers who call her "half-pint" have no clue what they're stepping into when they call her that.

Half my age. Half. So much life ahead of her. I hope I'm here to see it all...

Love, ya sweetie... Happy Birthday.